Stinky Flowers

The delicate and smelly fetid adder's tongue is one of my favorite early spring forest wildflowers. If I move too quickly or forget to look closely at just the right time, I miss this beauty.

Recently, I have been teaching and practicing the quality of deep friendliness. On the surface, friendliness, or unconditional benevolence, may sound simplistic. However, like all wisdom practices, it unfolds and deepens. Friendliness turns into a profound strength that protects as we move through this fragile, fraught world. Traditional Buddhist teachings say that the immediate cause of friendliness is seeing the lovable qualities in oneself and others. Of course, people (and flowers!) sometimes stink. The fetid adder's tongue smells rotten with a bit of old mushroom mixed in, yet it is still beautiful. In this same way, people, even people that are difficult, have lovable qualities. A mind that is stuck like velcro onto a story of the shortcomings of someone or something is tormented. Instead, set your heart free. Be courageous and take a moment to see for yourself the lovable qualities of those you dislike. Adder’s tongue (or the difficult person) may still smell bad and never be your favorite, but you don’t have burden yourself by hating.